al-Qaeda

I'm sitting here watching the mist descend down the hills as evening draws in, and as usual my mind begins to wander and ponder.

I began thinking about the chief "ooh scary" bogeyman as used by Government, TV and the Press to keep us all scared and off balance, I refer to (cue Dragnet theme) "Al - Qaeda".

Now, am I  the only person that thinks that this is a lot of tosh invented by Governments or more likely the CIA to justify their "War on Terror"?  Or was it an invention of a three time loser in Buffalo NY, to get himself off the hook?  I somehow think that they have given a load of dissipated extremists a name, a banner headline and we are responsible for inventing something that does not exist, for the convenience of the powers that be.

I was thinking back to the attack on Glasgow Airport a few years ago by highly trained, highly funded and intelligence led "Al Qaeda" operatives. So lets look at this in a wee bit more detail. First off these idiots try to set off two devices in London, which fail as they are total crap. Over and above that the Police now have these  idiots mobile phones and laptops in their hands and all the information they need on these operatives.

So now the daring duo head for Scotland and Glasgow, not a very good idea as it turns out. They pick up patio gas and some fuel at a petrol station in Dumfries. Remember brave reader that patio gas is designed to be mishandled by numpties (ie the general public), and is very hard to make it go "bang". Anyway, this pair of  galoots then head to Glasgow Airport and decide to crash a Land Rover into the airport concourse in the name of "Allah". Now a few problems start to arise, a) Land Rover is wider than door opening thus will not go through. b) Patio gas does not go "boom". c) In fact, zilch happens, couldn't get the matches to light.

So where are we? Oh yeah, two highly intelligent, highly funded "Al Qeada" operatives are jammed in a door at an Airport with patio gas, petrol, no matches, no sense, no BBQ and marshmallows as an alibi, a highly dubious insurance claim and their no-claims bonus shot.  So one decides to set himself on fire, providing the BBQ alibi for his pal, very intelligent, and his buddy, who literally shits himself, gets a serious kicking before going to jail for ever.  I guess the welcome mat is not oot in Glesga for "Al Qeada! The whole thing was more like Al Bundy than Al Qeada!

Now this beggers belief, this pair were Doctors but couldn't measure a door opening, I wonder what their reverse parking skills were like?, left personal evidence on phones and laptops, could not make anything go "boom", but one did suceed, eventually in setting himself on fire. Can anyone tell me were the terms "highly trained", "highly funded", "intelligence led" come into this? I can't. What I saw was a pair of thickoes with a death wish make a cheap, shoddy and really crap attack on Glasgow Airport.  This highly organised attack resulted in a small fire, a damaged Land Rover, a broken door, one shit covered twat and one medium to well done twat. And who on earth employed them as Doctors within the NHS?  I thought Doctors were supposed to be intellegent people, or at least a bit brighter than yer average punter?  Whoever hired them has an awful lot to answer for.

Also, next day folks had to queue for hours outside the Airport, why? Did the Authorities actually believe another attack was coming in? Look out! there's a posse of Zippo/Scottish Bluebell armed "Al Qeada" operatives in Toyota Landcruisers on the horizon! Don't worry the door is too wee and they have failed the "how wide is the vehicle?" question...again! Or was it to reinforce the "ooh Scary" again? I somehow suspect and believe it was the latter.


 The Beast of Ettrick

View from the bottom of Scotland

The views expressed below are based on my opinion and observation of the Press, Police and Political classes at his time. To the best of my knowledge all is based on fact.

28^th March 2011

Well, as I suspected, last Saturday’s TUC organised March against Government cuts has been totally eclipsed by the trouble caused by the Anarchists. UKUncut had organised the peaceful occupation of Fortnum and Masons, a store selling over priced food  for the inbred rich, which according to shoppers was peaceful until police decided they were all “Anarchists” too. Plod (police) then resorted to the usual indiscriminate baton blows and using riot shields as weapons. All seen on TV but glossed over to go after these “Anarchists” and as a result the Met police on the BBC wanting more “stop and search” powers.

I guess this suits the authorities as they can ignore the Inquiry into the G20 death of Ian Tomlinson which was caused by a riot cop shoving him over and instigating a heart attack. Said cop had a track record of this type of behaviour but no charges have ever been brought against him. The BBC as ever tries to ignore this and also as ever the press never question why Met Police wear balaclavas under riot helmets and all conveniently forget to wear their numbers.

All this also helps Nick Clegg Deputy PM of the ConDem “Coup d’état” to get off with yet another howler. This time the idiot, who as like most of his type has never worked an honest day in his life, did not know what was in the ConDem Budget and launched a tirade at Ed Balls The Shadow Chancellor. He accused him of “distorting the truth” until someone pointed out that the ConDems budget had in actual fact reduced pensioners Winter fuel Allowance by £50. Poor little Nicky floundering, again!  The man should come clean and join the Tories, no doubt Vince Cable his other ConDem co conspirator will, after all Vince has been a member of The Labour Party, The LibDems, ConDems so Tory should be his next logical step on his journey of discovery to the far right. No doubt both will be rewarded with a big Platinum pension and being booted upstairs to the unelected House of Lords for services to A) Their Bank Accounts B) Lying and C) being the face of the most amoral, power grabbing, reneging to the Electorate, lying political Party ever seen, I’ve seen some “ne’er do wells” in my time but this party don’t just scrape the bottom of the barrel, they are underneath it!

While this goes on the Scottish Government elections are coming up in May. Yet again more woes for floundering Nicky, seems Hugh O’Donnell a LibDem MSP has decided to quit and stand as an Independent, saying “I’ll take my chances with the electorate” and citing the ConDem alliance as the reason. I quote “It is a party I no longer want to be part of and neither should other principled Liberals,” he declared as he resigned his membership, citing “control freakery” at Holyrood and the “betrayal” of going into coalition with the Tories. He went on “The greatest betrayal of all, of course, is the alliance formed in London between the LibDems and the Tories,” he said. “Since that fateful day, I have watched helplessly from the sidelines as this Government at Westminster has attacked every vulnerable group in Scotland, from carers to disabled students to migrants, with some of the most draconian policies I have ever seen in the name of cuts”.

Thinking about it, I have noticed that my own local MP “the right dishonourable” Michael Moore ConDem, has been conspicuous by his absence since the May 2010 2Coup d’état”. No doubt his elevation to the heights of “Secretary of State for Scotland”, a non job I may add, due to devolved Government in Scotland, has caused his enforced absence from his constituency to his large, tax payer funded flat and to “serial troughing” in Edinburgh. So many more high class restaurants in Edinburgh compared to the Scottish Borders and one needs to spend ones expenses and 108% rise in pay since being appointed somewhere. No doubt there will also be an “oooh scary” terrorist threat element chucked in for good measure.

Surely  little Nicky will have his “Bumper book of Political excuses” at the ready when hopefully the Electorate of Scotland boot the LibDems and Tories out of power?  Unfortunately for the little toad this will not be a “by Election fluke” as he said after his parties disastrous showing in the recent Barnsley vote. His party going from a close second at the last General Election to sixth, being beaten to second place by UKIP, an Independent and nearly being beaten by the odious BNP, -oh, and they lost their deposit.

Ah well I am sure he will find solace in another bottle of ‘Bollie’, tax free of  course and on expenses. No doubt his buddy George Osborne “my daddies a millionaire”, Chancellor of the Exchequer, and never worked an honest day in his privileged life, will calm little Nicky’s fears about the cost of the Bollinger, reassuring him he will cut “some disabled  oiks benefit and put 3p on a litre of the proles petrol to pay for it, chin chin”  This “man” has dug a pit for himself and his Party that they cannot get out of. To little Nicky my advice is simple “cross the floor of the House with your rancid Party and let the Tories try and run a minority Government” Show some balls and try and salvage something of your disgraced and disgusting self.

The Beast of Ettrick